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My Marriage…Imperfectly Perfect

My Marriage…Imperfectly Perfect

My dad was a jeweler and owned his own store. This came in handy when my husband was picking out a ring in order to propose. It was beautiful! I felt like the luckiest girl with it on my finger. As we approached our 20 year mark of marriage, however, the 1980’s setting was well-past due for an “upgrade.” So, again, we sent it back to my dad to work his magic. Shortly after, my dad informed us that the center stone was cracked and it would be risky to reset it. What? I thought diamonds were the hardest rock there was. Was I that hard on it? Was it flawed from the beginning? We had a decision to make.

Finding Contentment Through Mindfulness

 Finding Contentment Through Mindfulness

A challenge to live life fully present!

How often do we focus our attention and energy on everything that is negative in our lives? We worry and compare ourselves to others who seem to have it all figured out. We long to feel good about our lives, to be fulfilled and find peace, but most often, we come up short. For me, I have become the expert on the “shoulds” in my life, reminding myself in every moment what I should or should not be doing on my internal, endless to do list. Instead of enjoying what should be the happy moments in my day, I focus on disappointment that things did not go the way I had hoped. Why do we choose worry so often? Are we afraid that if we give up our internal standards or worries about the future that we will somehow succumb to our greatest fears and lose any motivation to grow or move forward? Do we fear losing who we hope to become if we accept who we are or who others are in the moment? Even accepting this moment, that might feel broken and overwhelming?

A Case for Marital Intensives

A Case for Marital Intensives

Working in private practice in counseling for well over twenty years, I’ve seensome of the more frustrating times in couples counseling. Research has revealed that a typical couple waits approximately four years to come into counseling, despite experiencing the need earlier. Many times, by the time the couple appears in the counselor’s office, one or both of the partners have already reached a level of indifference or lack of desire to work on their relationship. This is the most challenging and scary place for couples to find themselves. By this point, their primary motive in attending counseling sometimes is checking this off their list, indicating that they tried everything, before heading to a divorce attorney.

Fearfully and Wonderfully made.. even my body?

Fearfully and Wonderfully made.. even my body?

“Ugh… You’re supposed to look less bloated in the morning, why does my stomach look so big this morning? I knew I shouldn’t have had that snack so late last night… why can’t I just have more self-control… I wonder if it’ll help if I do some crunches and push-ups before leaving” VS “Yes! I look and feel so skinny this morning… I can see my collarbones, my hip bones are starting to come back, there’s even toning in my stomach!”

Mornings were my favorite time of the day. I’m a morning person, the mirror always appeared kinder to me in the morning. I’d made a habit of standing in front of the mirror, infatuated with staring at every part of my body. There were days my face looked less swollen, my stomach less bloated, and my arms jiggled less, even my chest looked thinner.

Living Through Grief

Living Through Grief

We all at some point in our lives will have to face challenges, difficulties and loss. Grieving is a natural process that God gave us to deal with these experiences. Most people associate grief and mourning with death of a spouse, relative or someone we have a strong emotional attachment with. However there are many circumstances that might include grieving, including job loss, relationship breakups and major life changes caused by illness. In reality, any experiences or losses that affect us in a traumatic way can involve grieving.